Friends
Page Layout and Synopsis ©2001 by Darcy Partridge

The One With The Rumor

Episode 809

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Monica announces there will be no turkey for Thanksgiving because not enough people eat it; Joey convinces her to make it anyway, and he'll finish it off. Monica also invites an old friend from high school (Will), not knowing he hates Rachel for how she treated him. Will reveals that in high school, he and Ross formed the "I hate Rachel Green Club," and spread a rumor that she was a hermaphrodite. Rachel is quite upset until she's reminded that she spread the news that Ross made out with the 50-year old librarian. Joey does eventually finish the turkey, then has some pie.

The one where they said....

Monica: Remember that guy Will Colbert from high school?
Rachel: No.
Monica: He was in Ross's class. Marching band. He was kind of over-weight. Well, really over-weight. I mean, I was his thin friend.
Rachel: Wow, I don't remember him. Honey, are you sure you're not talking about your imaginary boyfriend?
Monica: No, that was Jarod. Wow. Haven't thought about him for a long time.

Monica: ...and Rachel's having her aversion to poultry.
Joey: She is?
Rachel: Yeah. Don't you remember I had to leave the room the other day when you had that roast chicken?
Joey: Yeah, but I thought that was just because I put the whole thing on my hand and made it walk across the table.

Phoebe: So, how's the game?
Chandler: I have no idea.
Phoebe: What?
Chandler: Yeah, I'm just pretending to watch the game so I don't have to help out with stuff.
Phoebe: I don't believe you! That is... brilliant!

Ross: I don't think I've seen you since Lance Davis's graduation party.
Will: That was such a fun night.
Ross: Yeah, it would have been good if we had gotten in, but still, real fun.
Will: Yeah.
Ross: Yeah.
Will: We were lame back then. Do you remember how into Dinosaurs we were?
Ross: Yeah....
Will: So what do you do now?
Ross: So how long are you in town?

Ross: Will, high school was a long time ago.
Will: Look at her standing there will those yams. My two greatest enemies, Ross. Rachel Green and complex carbohydrates.

Rachel: Hi! Will, right?
Will: Right.
Rachel: Right. Hi, I'm Rachel Green.
Will: Oh, I remember you.
Rachel: Really? Aren't you sweet. I gotta tell you, though. I'm having the hardest time placing you. Oh, oh, hang on, I think I remember you. Did we fool around at Lance Davis's graduation party?
Will: You are unbelievable.
Rachel: Thank you.

Ross: We... we said that the rumor was that, um, you had both male and female reproductive parts.
Rachel: What?
Will: That's right. We said your parents flipped a coin, decided to raise you as a girl, but you still had a hint of a penis.
Monica: You started that?
Rachel: What, you heard that?
Monica: Well, everyone in our school heard it.
Chandler: Everyone in my school heard it. You were the hermaphrodite cheerleader from Long Island?

Rachel: Monica, how come you never told me this?
Monica: I was afraid it might be true. And I was afraid you were gonna cry, and then show it to me.
Rachel: Joey, stop staring, there's nothing there. It's not true!
Joey: I'm afraid I'm gonna need proof.

Monica: Listen, you're just being silly. Rachel, even with that rumor, you were one of the most popular girls in school. I mean, everyone wanted to be like you. One girl wanted to be like you so much, she stuffed her pants with a tootsie roll.
Rachel: Wow...
Monica: And Ross, if it weren't for Rachel's rumor, I mean, no one in high school would even know who you were. She put you on the map!
Ross: As a romancer of the elderly.


Credits

Written by Shana Goldberg-Meehan
Directed by Gary Halvorson
Brad Pitt as Will Colbert (not listed in credits)
Aired 11/22/2001, 2/7/2002